The Loving Dead

In general zombie novels are not my first choice of reading material. However, I felt I must take advantage of the free online serial release of The Loving Dead by Amelia Beamer. While this novel has now been published, in the weeks leading up to publication it was released one chapter at a time on Beamer’s website. As this is her first published work as a fiction author this was probably a good idea.

Aside from the fact that this is a story about zombies (zombies seem to have almost as great a draw as vampires) I am afraid this novel may suffer from how region specific it feels. The setting is the Oakland Hills and Berkeley, California. This is near my home town and while it was pleasant to read about landmarks and such that felt familiar to me, I can’t really see it playing well among people that don’t know the region.

Also the characters are a little too strongly Northern Californian to settle well with the majority of readers. In fact this whole novel really felt like nothing so much as a direct representation of Beamer’s personal fantasies set down on a page. While I am sure Beamer has no desire to be attacked by a zombie, everything else with the exception of one or two graphic incidents very much felt like strong personal desires.

The actual quality of the writing was not that bad. Far better even than several massively popular authors of today, cough Stephanie Meyer cough. However the storyline needs much work and perhaps even a trip back to the drawing board.

Like most zombie tales, the unwitting populace is suddenly besieged by people turned into unthinking killing machines. Perhaps this novel is meant to portray the usual zombie tale in an ironic or sarcastic light. Unfortunately if this was Beamer’s intent she fell far short of the mark. The Loving Dead includes such uber-kitschy notions as the zombies being controlled by the sound of a cracking whip, even one from (massive free product placement) an iPhone app.

Then to make matters worse, just when the story was actually starting to roll a bit, after 15 or so chapters of nearly nothing but down home references and Northern California in-crowd feelings, Beamer wraps up the main story arc in a neat little bow and jumps into the future with an epilogue.

I actually felt this could be classified as a fun little read until this time jump occurred. There was really no resolution or true climax, merely a sudden and very cliché ending and then the epilogue. To make matters worse, the epilogue not only finished the cutesy little packaging job, but also out of nowhere tried to make a major parallel between zombies and discrimination against those of homosexual orientation. Beamer goes so far into this parallel as to name an anti-zombie law Prop 8.

In my opinion Beamer broke nearly every law of writing in this novel. There is nothing that will make the characters or the story appealing to the public. The novel is rife with brand names. The story spins it’s wheels for chapter after chapter, then suddenly resolves. Finally the epilogue introduces new concepts so abruptly and tactlessly that it essentially appears to be little more than propaganda. I give this novel a 2/5.